Funny SMS & SMS Jokes

I’m sending these flowers
To all of my friends
Because summer has ended
And now fall begins!

I know it’s not a holiday,
It’s just a change of season,
Still I thought that it would be
As fine as any reason…

Here’s sending you all the best
For a truly wonderful fall!

Pradeep Sharma

I’d like to wish you a happy day.
A happy day is the breeze blowing through your hair.
A happy day is sunshine warming your skin.
A happy day is eating your favorite meal.
A happy day is having personal time to yourself.
A happy day is walking away from the stresses of life.
A happy day is appreciating having your health.
A happy day is reflecting on all the special
people who are there for you.
A happy day is appreciating that you were
given this day to enjoy, so make the best of it.

I hope you have a happy day!

Pradeep Sharma

Love is something concerned with emotions.
Love controls our activities.
Love is a mutual feeling between two people.
If you are really in love with someone then you will do anything for their well being and will live for their survival.

Written by Sachin Rathi

Greatness lies not in being strong, but in the right use of strength.

Medicines and Friendships
both cure problems.
Only difference is that,
friendship do not have
an expiry date,
no price and
no dosage.

Have a Nice Day.

With each day that passes
I find myself investing more and more
Into this relationship;
Faith, hope, trust,
and even my dreams….

If there were a reason to keep living,
I’ve found ten thousand in you….
This is what you’ve done to me,
And continue to do….

Because of this and more,
You’re Someone Special In My Life

I DON’T NEED

I Don’t Need To See You
To Love You
I Only Need To Know You’re There

I Don’t Need To Feel You
To Have You Touch My Heart
I Only Need To Know You Care
I Don’t Need To Look Into Your Eyes
To Believe That This Is Real
I Only Need To Understand
What You Think And Feel
Love, It Is A Feeling
That Can’t Be Seen
And Though,
I Would Love To Have You Here To Hold
Just By Having You In My Life
I Have Everything
I Love You

TRUE LOVE MEANS:

Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot…

…Who calls you back when you hang up on him…

…Who will stay awake just to watch you sleep…

…Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead…

…who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats…

…Who holds your hand in front of his friends…

…Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you…

…Wait for the one who turns to his friends and says,

…That’s her!…

Pradeep Sharma

I may not have a lot of fame
Nor a mansion on a hill
I have no real fine gifts to give
There is nothing to reveal.

I do not have a lot of wealth
But I have the things I need
There are those who have most everything
Whose lives are full of greed.

I have a kind and loving heart
With gentleness doth reign
There are those who have no heart at all
And send out lots of pain.

I have a wonderful spirit
That will never grow jagged or old
There are those who have no feeling at all
Their days are dark and cold.

I have a wonderful pair of legs
To help me get around
There are those who have no legs at all
To lift them when they’re down.

I have a wonderful pair of arms
To give a hug or two
There are those who have no arms at all
To feel the love I do.

I have a wonderful pair of hands
To let me work and play
There are those who have no hands at all
To help them through the day.

I have a wonderful pair of ears
To listen to the rain
There are those who cannot hear at all
The splash upon the pane.

I have a wonderful pair of eyes
They have beheld some beautiful sights.
There are those who cannot see at all
Their world is black as night.

I have a wonderful sense of smell
And enjoyed the aroma of flowers
There are those who cannot know this joy
And miss life’s fragrant hours.

My life has been a rainbow
With only a bit of strife
Today I counted my blessings
I have a wonderful life.

-Pradeep Sharma

When I think back
on my life,
the saddest part
isn’t the dreams
I failed to pursue,
not the times of
bad luck,
misfortune,
or bad health,
but the time I didn’t spend,
the things I should have said
but didn’t say,
the comfort I didn’t lend,
the help I didn’t give,
and, most of all,
the people I couldn’t
or wouldn’t love.
Hopefully, you won’t
make the same mistakes!

Have A Nice Day
Pradeep Sharma

GOOD MORNING… !!!

Decide to be happy today,
to live with what is yours -
your family, your business, your job.
If you can’t have what you like,
maybe you can like what you have.

Just for today, be kind, cheerful, agreeable,
responsive, caring, and understanding.
be your best, dress your best, talk softly, look
for the bright side of things.

Praise people for
what they do and don’t criticize them for what they cannot do.
If someone does something stupid, forgive and forget.
After all, it’s just for one day.
Who knows, it might turn out to be a good day!

HAVE A NICE DAY
Pradeep Sharma

TEN RULES FOR A GOOD DAY !!!

TODAY I WILL NOT STRIKE BACK:
If someone is rude, if someone is impatient, if someone is unkind…I will not respond in a like manner.

TODAY I WILL ASK GOD TO BLESS MY “ENEMY”:
If I come across someone who treats me harshly or unfairly, I will quietly ask God to bless that individual. I understand the “enemy” could be a family member, neighbor, co-worker, or a stranger.

TODAY I WILL BE CAREFUL ABOUT WHAT I SAY:
I will carefully choose and guard my words being certain that I do not spread gossip.

TODAY I WILL GO THE EXTRA MILE:
I will find ways to help share the burden of another person.

TODAY I WILL FORGIVE:
I will forgive any hurts or injuries that come my way. TODAY I WILL DO SOMETHING NICE FOR SOMEONE, BUT I WILL DO IT SECRETLY: I will reach out anonymously and bless the life of another.

TODAY I WILL TREAT OTHERS THE WAY I WISH TO BE TREATED:
I will practice the golden rule – “Do unto others as I would have them do unto me” – with everyone I encounter.

TODAY I WILL RAISE THE SPIRITS OF SOMEONE I DISCOURAGED:
My smile, my words, my expression of support, can make the difference to someone who is wrestling life.

TODAY I WILL NURTURE MY BODY:
I will eat less; I will eat only healthy foods. I will thank God for my body.

TODAY I WILL GROW SPIRITUALLY:
I will spend a little more time in prayer today: I will begin reading something spiritual or inspirational today; I will find a quiet place and listen to God’s voice !

Have A Nice Day
Pradeep Sharma

Santa : I tried your number so many times, it always said ‘Switched Off’!”
Banta : Nahi Pape, it’s my HELLO TUNE!
—————————————-
Daku Mangal Singh Banta Ke Ghar Mein Ghus Ayaa..
Daku : Sona kahan hai, Jaldi Bataao…!
Banta : Pura Ghar Khali Hai Malko, Jithe Marzi So Jao!
—————————————-
Santa : Kaisi Sabzi Banai Hai, Bilkul Gobar Jaisa Swad Hai !
Jasmeet: Hey bhagwan! Na Jane Inhone Kya-Kya Kha Ke Dekha Hua Hai.
Gobar Ka Swad Bhi Pata Hai..!
—————————————-
Banta : Praji, Jab Main Paida Hua Tha To Military Walon Ne 21 Topein Chalayeen Thi.
Santa : Kamaal Hai ! Sab Ka Nishana Kayse Chook Gaya ..?
—————————————-
Santa : Drinking-n-Driving Dono Nalo Naal Nai Ho Sakde.
Banta : Kyoo Ji ?
Santa : e SpeedBbreaker Aa Gaya Taa Peg Dul Jau.
—————————————-
Phone Ki Ganti Baji.
Santa : Phone Mere Liye Ho To Kehna Mein Ghar Pe Nahin Hoon.
Jasmeet: Wo Ghar Pe Hain.
Santa : Maine Mana Kiya Tha Ke…
Jasmeet: Phone Mere Liye Tha!
—————————————-
Santa : Aapne Nurse Bahut Changi Rakhi Hai, Uska Haath Lagtey Hi Mein Theek Ho Gaya.
Doctor : Jaanta Hoon, Thappad Ki Awaaz Mujhe Bhi Sunai Di Thi.
—————————————-
Santa : Yaar! Main Apna Purse Ghar Bhool Aaya, Mainu 1000 Rs Chahide Si.
Banta : Dost Hi Dost De Kam Aunda Hai, Le 10 Rs, Riksha Kar Te Purse Le Aa.
—————————————-
Banta : Wo Ladki Deaf Lagti Hai. Main Kuch Kehta Hoon, Woh Kuch Aur Hi Bolti Hai.
Santa : Kaise?
Banta : Maine Kaha I Luv U, To Woh Boli ‘Maine Kal Hi Naye Sandal kharide hain’
—————————————-
A crow shits on Banta. Preeto gives tissue paper to him.
Banta: Koi Fhayda Nahin, Kauwa Toh Udd Gaya ..!
—————————————-
Santa : When I get mad at you,you never fight back.How do you control your anger?
Jasmeet: I clean the toilet bowl.
Santa : How does that help?
Jasmeet: I use your toothbrush!

May all your days be merry
With childhood dreams to share
No matter what your age is
The joy is always there

With candles that are glowing
Each year a grand design
No matter what the theme is
The day will always shine

Cookies, cup cakes, candies
With lots of kisses too
Taffy by the handful
For any age will do

Your Birthday should be special
With joy beyond compare
The child in you is laughing
With love that’s so aware

So have a day of happiness
Turning one more page
Life will bring the laughter
The heart will never age.

Chintu Apne Dost Ko Apna Dukhda Suna Raha Tha- “Meri Bivi Pinki Ne Hamare Naye Makaan Me Apni Pasand Ka Rang Karayaa, Naya Furniture Kharida, Naye Palang, Nai Mej, Nai Kursiyaa, Naye Parde Lagaye… Aur Bhi Dhero Chije Kharid Kar Makaan Ko Sajayaa- Sanvaraa.”
“To Fir Problem Kya Hai?” Dost Ne Puchha.
“Ab Vo Mujse Talak Chahati Hai.” Chintu Ne Kaha.
“Vo Kyo?” Dost Ne Puchha.
“Kyoki Use Lagta Hai Ki Mera Huliya Ghar Ki Nai Saaj-Sajja Se Match Nahi Kar Raha.”

Chintu Neta Ji Ko Phootball Ka Final Match Dekhne Aur Inam Baantane Ke Liye Aamantrit Kiya Gaya.
Is Mauke Par Unhone Apne Bhashn Me Kaha- Jitne Wali Team Ko Trauphy Dete Hue Muje Bahut Khushi Ho Rahi Hai. Lekin Sath Hi Afsos Is Baat Ka Hai Ki Sirf Do Hi Team Final Me Pahunch Saki. Bhavishya Me Hame Yah Dhyaan Rakhna Hoga Ki Khiladiyo Ko Jyadaa Se Jyadaa Suvidhaye Di Jaye, Taki Jyada Se Jayada Team Final Me Pahunch Sake.”

Pared Se Pahale Kamaandar Ne Fauji Chintu Se Puchha- “Chintu, Tumne Aaj Dadhi Kyo Nahi Banai?”
Chintu Fauji Ne Darte-Darte Kaha- “Maine Dadhi To Banai Thi, Lekin Ek Hi Aaine Ke Saamane Ham Saat Aath Jawaan Dadhi Bana Rahe The. Lagta Hai Maine Galti Se Kisi Aur Ki Dadhi Bana Di.”

Ladka- “Tumharaa Ghar Jane Ka Kya Iradaa Hai?”
Ladki- “Tumhare Paas Kitne Rupye Hai?”
Ladka- “Lagbhag Char Sau Rupye Hai?”
Ladki- “Filhal Char-Paanch Din Tak Jaane Ka Koi Iradaa Nahi.”

Koktel Party Me Jamkar Pine Ke Baad Chintu Ji Ghar Laut Rahe The.
Raaste Me Unhone Dekha Ki Kuchh Log Sadak Par Ek Bada-Sa Gaddha Khod Rahe Hai. Chintu Ne Ladkhadaati Awaj Me Puchha- “Is Samay Yaha Aap Log Kya Kar Rahe Hai?”
“Ha Surang Bana Rahe Hai.”
“Kitna Samay Lag Jayega?”
“Paanch Chh Mahine.”
Chintu Ji Kuchh Der Tak Sochte Rahe Fir Bole- “Fir Mai Taxi Hi Le Letaa Hu.”

We gain & lose things every day.
But trust me on 1 thing:
U WILL NEVER LOSE ME!
I will always b there as a friend!
………… ……… ……………..
True friends are like Diamonds…
They are real & rare.
False friends r like leaves…
They r scattered everywhere.
………… ……… ……………..
1 tree can start a forest,
One smile can start a friendship.
1 touch can show u care,
One friend can make life worth living 4.
………… ……… ……………..
If one day u feel like crying, call me.
I can’t promise to make u laugh,
But I’m willing to cry with u.