Funny SMS & SMS Jokes

1.
Mulla Nasrudin went to the psychiatrist and asked if the good doctor couldn’t split his personality.
”Split your personality?” asked the doctor. ”Why in heaven’s name do you want me to do a thing like
that?”
”BECAUSE,” said Nasrudin! ”I AM SO LONESOME.”

2.
During a religious meeting an attractive young widow leaned too far over the balcony and fell, but
her dress caught on a chandelier and held her impended in mid-air. The preacher, of course,
immediately noticed the woman’s predicament and called out to his congregation: ”The first person
who looks up there is in danger of being punished with blindness.”
Mulla Nasrudin, who was in the congregation whispered to the man next to him, ”I THINK I WILL
RISK ONE EYE.”

3.
”What’s the idea of coming in here late every morning, Mulla?” asked the boss.
”IT’S YOUR FAULT, SIR,” said Mulla Nasrudin. ”YOU HAVE TRAINED ME SO THOROUGHLY NOT
TO WATCH THE CLOCK IN THE OFFICE, NOW I AM IN THE HABIT OF NOT LOOKING AT IT AT
HOME.”

4.
”What’s the idea,” asked the boss of his new employee, Mulla Nasrudin, ”of telling me you had five
years’ experience, when now I find you never had a job before?”
”WELL,” said Nasrudin, ”DIDN’T YOU ADVERTISE FOR A MAN WITH IMAGINATION?”

5.
Applicants for a job on a dam had to take a written examination, the first question of which was,
”What does hydrodynamics mean?”
Mulla Nasrudin, one of the applicants for the job, looked at this, then wrote against it: ”IT MEANS I
DON’T GET JOB.”

6.
The boss was asked to write a reference for Mulla Nasrudin whom he was dismissing after only one
week’s work. He would not lie, and he did not want to hurt the Mulla unnecessarily. So he wrote:
”TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN: MULLA NASRUDIN WORKED FOR US FOR ONE WEEK, AND
WE ARE SATISFIED.”

7.
A man who took his little girls to the amusement park noticed that Mulla Nasrudin kept riding the
merry-go-round all afternoon. Once when the merry-go-round stopped, the Mulla rushed off, took a
drink of water and headed back again. As he passed near the girls, their father said to him, ”Mulla,
you certainly do like to ride on the merry-go-round, don’t you?”
”NO, I DON’T. RATHER I HATE IT ABSOLUTELY AND AM FEELING VERY SICK BECAUSE OF IT,”
said Nasrudin. ”BUT,
THE FELLOW WHO OWNS THIS THING OWES ME
80ANDTAKINGITOUTINTRADEISTHEONLYWAY IWILLEV ERCOLLECTFROMHIM.”

8.
”I will bet anyone here that I can fire thirty shots at 200 yards and call each shot correctly without
waiting for the marker. Who will wager a ten spot on this?” challenged Mulla Nasrudin in the
teahouse.
”I will take you,” cried a stranger.
They went immediately to the target range, and the Mulla fired his first shot. ”MISS,” he calmly and
promptly announced.
A second shot, ”MISSED,” repeated the Mulla.
A third shot. ”MISSED,” snapped the Mulla.
”Hold on there!” said the stranger. ”What are you trying to do? You are not even aiming at the target.
And, you have missed three targets already.”
”SIR,” said Nasrudin, ”I AM SHOOTING FOR THAT TEN SPOT OF YOURS, AND I AM CALLING
MY SHOT AS PROMISED.”

9.
A rich widow had lost all her money in a business deal and was flat broke. She told her lover, Mulla
Nasrudin, about it and asked, ”Dear, in spite of the fact that I am not rich any more will you still love
me?”
”CERTAINLY, HONEY,” said Nasrudin, ”I WILL. LOVE YOU ALWAYS – EVEN THOUGH I WILL
PROBABLY NEVER SEE YOU AGAIN.”

10.
A patent medicine salesman at the fair was shouting his claims for his Rejuvenation Elixir. ”If you
don’t believe the label, just look at me,” he shouted. ”I take it and I am 300 years old.”
”Is he really that old?” asked a farmer of the salesman’s young assistant, Mulla Nasrudin.
”I REALLY DON’T KNOW,” said Nasrudin. ”YOU SEE, I HAVE ONLY BEEN WITH HIM FOR 180
YEARS.”